Sunday, September 21, 2008

Round pegs and square holes.

Ever felt like you fit in, like you were meant to be with someone or at something? This is how school is for me. As most of you know, I have always been a round peg faced with square holes, and most of my life has been either to change me or to change the holes. At School I am a round peg and I am surrounded by round holes and other round pegs... it really is wonderful! This past week has been exhausting and exhilarating; it has been both a journey within and a connecting with something larger. I feel plugged in, separate and unique, yet connected to that which connects us all, Universal Energy (God/Creator/Goddess). It is amazing to be able to talk about what you think and feel, and your spiritual experiences without censorship, without fear, with only openness and acceptance. Don't get me wrong, I have had a lot of acceptance in my life, more than most people, most especially through my environmental work and my experience through non-profits, but even then I felt like I was keeping part of me a secret, part that was conspiring to break free. I have been very lucky to have many amazing individuals come and go in my life, to teach me, guide me and support me. I truly feel loved and supported in what I am doing and that makes such a huge difference when embarking upon a new course. Each day I am filled to the brim with gratitude!

The one upside/downside of all of this is the emotional work, is that it opens up my Mary wounds and illuminates my broken heart. Well the broken heart, of course, is from more than Mary, but all of my brokenness is over shadowed by her loss. The good news is that when I went within it was not as bad as I feared. Over the past 2 years (OMG I still can not believe it has been 2 years in November, it still feels like yesterday) I have done a lot of healing work with therapists and Elders and have let go of a great deal of emotional baggage in the process. I can now come to this work prepared to break free and really experience gratitude for Mary and for what she has taught me and gifted me with her death, and for the other teachers who, for better or worse, have impacted my journey. It really is like the Universe is conspiring to bring me to this place of healing so that I can channel that healing energy for others. And I am so very grateful for this opportunity.

Each of my classmates comes from different places and with a different set of experiences to share, some corporate, some questioning, some from other healing professions and some from pain and suffering, and each time they share they teach me with their point of view and I am so very grateful for them and their willingness to share with me.

This past week has also had some fun times. On Friday I went to the Carrot Common on the Danforth with 2 classmates, Val and John Paul and we had a blast shopping for healing crystals and massage oils. Then we went to Kennsington Market which is a mirage of funky stores, organic food and vegetarian restaurants. Another place for round pegs! hehe I have put some pictures on my facebook!

Also this week end Julie and I finished up the canning with cabbage rolls and stuffed peppers both smothered in homemade tomato sauce, and Salsa with lots of coriander. Well Back to my studies, of Anatomy and Physiology and shopping on Ebay for a massage table.

This week end also marked the leaving of our dear friend Luke Clark who is going Overseas to serve in the Army, Good Luck Luke, you will be in our thoughts and prayers for a safe return!

Happy Birthday Ronnie and Teresa!

Big Love

No comments: