Sunshine....

The sun is shinning brightly and reflected off the trees behind my house, the world is cold and crisp and clean.... and the day is unfolding with magic.... starting with my wonderful Patty-chouli soap made by my good friends at Sudsmuffin... aromatherapy is really a brilliant way to start a day!

The ice covered bush

bent by an oppressive weight tries desperately to hold on,
for the sun to resurrect the world again ,
and give us warmth, and comfort, and solace.
Finally it comes, and as it shone through the densely laden branches
millions of tiny rainbows flowed outward and inward.
Magnificence, symbolic of the first covenant, juxtaposed
by exposed succulent fibers that tink tinkle in the wind.
An exquisite melodic sound fills the air
and yet, distant eerie cries, crack cracking ,
like a silent scream, felt with your heart, is all that is heard.
And as each limb gives itself up, no longer able to wait for salvation,
numbness replaces our joy.
How can something so beautiful be so devastating
and yet, give us hope?

Another loss somewhere....

I feel everything that happens in the world, almost like an oppressive weight sometimes... then I withdraw... and do not listen any more.... then I am OK again... when I become aware of the weight I am OK again... when something like Haiti happens in the world I feel like dark energy is sitting on my chest, blocking my heart chakra.. So, I Reiki me and I send distant Reiki to it... and that helps... I do not try to make sense of any thing anymore... because this kind of thing does not make sense... Dawson... WTF.. I mean, how do you make sense of that.. my Cody... years battling then dies... why, why, why... it makes no sense... my darling kind, beautiful joyful Mary.. why... why take her from me, and the earth... why... so I do not try to unravel it any more... that makes me crazy... Now I am of the mind.. everything is what it is... and maybe, just maybe, it is not mine to understand... I am not to know why.... I am sure some one is learning something somewhere.... so I just let it be and I worry about what I can control ME... I know that might sound rather simple and escapist but I am but one person, and the weight of the world is not mine to carry, it is God/Goddess/Universe's.... not mine! And in that I am free to love and send light and healing... for David's mom my heart aches, for Dawson's parents my heart bleeds... for each child who suffers and dies my heart breaks... but realizing that I can do nothing, and should do nothing except send light and listen and console frees me to be good at those things... do do those things that when I needed it, really mattered... does that make sense?

3 whole years....

I thought it would get easier after 3 years but it hasn’t. The sound of your sweet voice lingers in the chambers of my heart, and your impish smile is imprinted on my mind. Nothing prepares you for this kind of loss. Nothing. It’s irrational, I know, but I want the whole world to feel your loss with the same intensity as I. And as I grieve, the world spins madly on.
Forever loved and missed by Mom, Zech, Emma and Hanna

November... floating along in pink sunshine

3 years ago Zoe died and for the first time my heart knew fear.. if it could happen to her, it could happen... real, honest to god, chocking when you breathe, fear... I was never on the verge of loosing.. not like that.... then 3 weeks later, my world came to a complete stand still.. and my heart knew pain.. deep, searing unfathomable pain... and 3 years has flown by and it still seems like yesterday... I miss you more today than yesterday... I miss you.. I really, really miss you!

slow and easy....

My life moves at incredible speed.... do I do it, or is that just this lifetimes theme?

So much happens in a short period of time and yet I feel slow and calm inside... this is the gift that purpose has given me, and I am grateful. As I move into Fall I am reminded of gratitude, kindness and abundance.... and I revel in the joy that comes from living with the knowledge that the Universe will given me all that I need to learn and grow in Spirit... that all that I need, I already have.

I am working almost everyday at the Centre, trying to get caught up on bills after having been away for a year. And at the same time I am building my client base, doing case studies and spending time with my children. I am creating home healing parties, teaching Reiki, and working on a series of Chakra workshops.

Reiki- during my Master attunement I was told that I was being called to teach.. to bring Reiki to those who came to me to learn... little did I know that once I accepted this directive, people would come. The group that presented this month are Women living in Poverty, their payment is community service... pay it forward!

This past month I gave free 15 minute intuitive Reiki session at an Envirofair and I was both nervous and exhilarated. Like all things that comes to me by intuition, I trusted its rightness and it was a success. I had not used Reiki in this way before and was surprised at how effective it was for focused treatment of illness. I am now using it along with Medical Intuition, and it application has been profound.

I attended an amazing workshop on angel communication and am overjoyed that I can channel Angels during treatments. Angels and Spirit Guides, Totems and messages... it truly is amazing to connect with Spirit. My joy comes from being allowed to witness healing and growth, and each time I do I heal and grow through the experience.

I have started doing home parties as well.. like Tupperware but for energy healing... each party can be customized to suit the host and guests... let me know if you would like to arrange one!

Speaking of Tupperware... I have developed this fascination with old school pieces... it happened at the office... a bunch of things were donated and I saw this little pink cup with the white lid (you know the one, probably from the 60's) and I had to have it... I asked my boss, because we never take the donations for ourselves... and she said, "Sure, that is the garbage pile Patty".... hehe... the little cup was stained and worn from years of use.. I brought it home and gently cleaned it with mild soap and a toothbrush and it gleamed... I have made room for it with my good china... there is something fabulous about a kitchen piece with a story of it's own... I am not sure why I am collecting it, but a new collection has begun!

As the turkey thaws I give thanks... for all that I have AND all that I have lost.. through each I grow in Spirit and this brings me closer to PEACE.

A newer beginning?

This past month, getting settled in at home and working many jobs, has been hectic and time consuming. I am starting a new, full-time job, on Monday which should give me more financial security and a schedule in which to begin to plan my life around. I am excitedly working on the clinic, have ordered promotional material, am almost decorated, and have a website in the making (www.solutions4healing.ca) thanks to Julie's brother Gerard:-, and I have started seeing clients... which I am abundantly grateful for. This past week I was attuned to another lineage of Reiki, at all 3 levels, and my channel feels even more open, thank you Michael my darling friend!

And today the sun is shinning and laundry beckons, it is my only day off so I am going to get out there and enjoy it!

change of plans.. I just got called into the shelter for work... I guess today is going to be a spa day for Homeless women!

thoughts as I teach Reiki....

desired ending

the Soul, ravaged by years of miss-use (missed/used),
becomes resplendent in it’s quest for the light.